Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Randomize
