They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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