So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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