Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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