there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
The power of my boobs compel you
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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