I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
