am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
