I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Randomize
