He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
