people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
