4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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