In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
