he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
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