its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
