turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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