lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
