I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
