I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
