I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
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