oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
