someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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