Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Randomize
