i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
