New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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