Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
