NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize