ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
