her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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