yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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