its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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