I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
you have to choose: penises or morals?
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
