i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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