people are starting to question the shark bite story
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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