"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Randomize
