I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
