Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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