Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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