the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
