just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
