tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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