I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
3 2 1 whiskey
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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