He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
