Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
tell me about the fingering
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