i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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