i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
