He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
