Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
