You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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