I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I have already put on my inside pants.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
