Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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