is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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